Family Systems

          This week in Family Relations we talked about the different theories social scientists use to guide their research and to explain intimate relationships. Among these theories are: exchange theory, symbolic interaction theory, conflict theory, and systems theory.  For the most part we focused on the systems theory. The book we are reading out of called Marriage and Family: the Quest for Intimacy by Robert H. Lauer says the following things about systems theory:

“As applied to intimate relationships, system theory asserts that the intimate group must be analyzed as a whole; the group has boundaries that distinguish it from other groups. Thus, particular people from the system have particular rules and roles that apply to their system. Furthermore, the group is also composed of interrelated parts or individuals. That is, the parts are not independent but influence each other and work together in such a way that the system tends to be maintained; outside influences generally cause minimal change. If the system is composed of there or more individuals (as in a family with children), various subsystems may arise (like parent and child may form a coalition against the other parent).  Although such subsystems may appear to be threatening, they actually end to maintain the system. For instance, a woman may remain in a marriage only because she and her child support and protect each other when the alcoholic husband and father becomes abusive. “

            We talked about how many family therapists use the systems model in their practice. They put this into action by making family maps. Family maps are used to get a picture of the degree and quality of interaction or connection between individuals, between family subsystems, and around the family.  The kinds of relationships are mapped out through different kinds of boundaries. The following boundaries symbols include:

Rigid boundaries: (little exchange of information or warmth), were drawn with a simple solid line”­­­­ (-----) between the different parties or around a subsystem.  (This simple diagram would suggest a husband and wife who are not very close: H|W). Rigid boundaries are also called closed or impermeable boundaries.

Permeable or clear boundaries (an appropriate or healthy degree and quality exchange of information or warmth) were drawn with a dashed line (- - - -). These might also be called reasonably- or appropriately-open boundaries. 

Poor or diffuse boundaries are indicated with a dotted line (. . . . .), suggesting that the boundaries are easily violated. These might also be called very open, overly-open, or unclear boundaries, as they fail to clearly define the boundaries between individuals or subsystems.

 Affiliation, or involvement between individuals or subsystems, is indicated by two parallel lines (====) run from one party (individual or subset) to the other.

Over involvement is indicated by three parallel lines, and indicates that there is too much exchange of information or behavior. Conflict is indicated by lines with an obvious break (---/ /---).

Detouring refers to the behavior of relating or responding to others via another.

We were challenged to make our own family systems map for a time frame that we determined.  This was particularly interesting or pivotal in the functioning of our family; like when we moved out, or perhaps when a family crisis occurred.  I would like to challenge anyone reading this to make their own family systems map, it really is an enlightening exercise, and can help you try to gain a deeper understanding of how different relationships in your family work. It can also help you to try and see if there are some things you can do to try and make some of these boundaries healthier.