Family Crisis

     This week in class we discussed family crisis and coping mechanisms. From our discussions I have found that there is strong evidence that family crisis can strengthen families when dealt in the right way. I believe it is vital that families learn effective coping strategies to deal with any family crises that should happen. Every family should make a goal to become a resilient family, or one that can resist disruption in the face of change and cope effectively with crises. In my textbook: Marriage and Family the Quest for Intimacy by Robert H. Lauer it explains that, “The strengths that help make a family resilient include the following:

·         Accord, or relationships that foster problem-solving and manage conflict well.

·         Celebrations, including birthdays, religious days, and other special events,

·         Communication, both beliefs and emotion.

·         Good financial management.

·         Hardiness, which includes commitment to the family, the belief that family members have control over their lives, and the sense that the family can deal with all changes.

·         Health, both physical and emotional.

·         Shared leisure activities.

·         Acceptance of each member’s personality and behavior.

·         A social support network of relatives and friends.

·         Sharing routines such as family meals and chores.

·         Traditions that carry over form one generation to another.

Families that have worked at developing these strengths will be in a position to deal effectively with stressors and with crises.”

      So if families tried to work on these things, and improve them, it will better help them be prepared to deal with family crises. The textbook also listed the tools for effective coping, they listed: “

·         “Take responsibility-take responsibility for yourself and your family, do not deny or avoid the problem or blame others.

·         Affirm yours and your family’s worth- believe in yourself and in your ability to deal with difficult situations.

·         Balance self-concern with other-concern.

·         Learn the art of reframing- reframing is redefining the meaning of something, is a way of changing your perspective on a situation. It isn’t the situation that is changed but the way that you look at it.

·         Find and use available resources- every family has numerous internal and external resources to which it can turn in a time of crisis.”

     Another thing I found that I really love was on a website and it explained some ways to help diffuse a crisis. The first thing it listed was active listening. It said: “Active listening is perhaps the most important technique for defusing a crisis. For many families in crisis, active listening may be all that is needed to restore family functioning. Active listening with families may involve:

·         Encouraging the expression of feelings;

·         Acknowledging the real loss or tragedy experienced by a family;

·         Reflecting feelings expressed by the family;

·         Normalizing the family's reactions;

·         Conveying acceptance of the family, but not of destructive behaviors; 

·         Reframing family statements or behaviors to emphasize the positives;

·         Focusing on the "here and now";

·         Confronting inconsistencies in family statements or behaviors in tactful ways;

·         Clarifying a family's priorities among many issues; and

·         Summarizing and bringing closure to emotional topics.”

If you want to read more the website is http://eclkc.ohs.acf.hhs.gov/hslc/tta-system/family/Family%20and%20Community%20Partnerships/crisis%20support/homelessness/famcom_fts_009545_091705.html

     Unfortunately, every family will have its hardships and challenges to overcome. These things can either bring a family closer together, or tear them apart. I know that if we strive to implement the things mentioned above into our families, we will be fostering healthy relationships, and preparing our families for the troubles ahead.